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scary w. on Birdeye

★★

3 years ago

To say that Indra Finch’s malpractice almost caused my death is unfortunately not a disgruntled exaggeration; her malfeasance was grave indeed. My mom and I came to Ms. Finch in 2015 seeking family therapy. My mom and father are both known malignant narcissists who have destroyed nigh every one of their interpersonal relationships, as well as their careers. It took over 30 years for them to each be outed as miscreants. They imprisoned and isolated me (and to a lesser extent my brothers) in a heavily abusive, white-supremacist, fundamentalist Baptist cult for the first 18 years of my life. When my mom reached out to me after I had estranged her for a decade, seemingly apologetic for her behavior, I was thrilled when my stipulation for repairing the relationship (therapy) was agreed upon. Logic is my natural advocate, so naturally I thought that a professional in the field of psychology would be just what we needed. Before and following Ms. Finch I have had very healing experiences from other professionals in the field of psychology to treat lifelong as well as interim grief, lifelong CPTSD, and the panic/anxiety disorder that formed upon my attempted reconciliation with my mom. The same naivete that led me to think my mom would be capable of more than a showy harmony also led me to trust that professionals are concerned with being ethically good, and--having had only great experiences with therapy previously-- Indra Finch had my full confidence. Anticipating how difficult my mom and I would be, I specifically chose her because she is an actual psychologist with a Ph.D. and not merely a counselor. We were not easy patients. My mom is (necessarily) a pathological liar, and I was deep in the throes of CPTSD and brand-new panic/anxiety disorder, both stemming directly from my mom's repeatedly ill behavior. Our shared past is also horrifying (as the 2006 -reported- statistic was that 80% of American families are abusive in one or more forms, this is actually the norm; unreportedly, the real number is actually much higher). When we came in, Indra said she was up to the task. My mom, then a pediatric nurse of nearly 40 years at MBCH, used her insurance. She also saw Indra separately, and I went to another clinic with my insurance to see another therapist separately, and we both went in to see each other's counselors together (though we never saw each other's counselors individually) so that the full scope of what had happened and was happening could be indubitably checked. As a lifelong narcissist, my mom is a very good actor; this is how all narcissists operate. However, she's my mom, I love her, and I’d always longed for nothing more than to have the family I was born into be healthy and close, so putting my trust in a professional who was educated and trained to help in exactly these matters was the only way anything was going to change for the better. Suffice it to say that my mom immediately denied all wrongdoing, blamed everything from the past on my father (yes, he was –also- responsible), and went straight into pathologically lying and mischaractarizing, gaslighting constantly. When I saw that Indra was (I thought at the time) believing these lies in spite of all very obvious evidence to the contrary (what I mentioned the first paragraph was presented by both of us as fact; the only difference in testimony is that my mom was denying all onus) I knew it was only a matter of time until I caught my mom in a lie in front of Ms. Finch, and then at last real change could begin to be effected. Months into our "therapy" I finally did catch her in a lie in front of Ms. Finch; Ms. Finch's response was to say "well, everyone lies" and then change the subject! wordpress scarywhitman for the rest.